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I love to read.
That's what made me want to become a book blogger after all. Love of reading. I enjoy diving into these made up places and meeting these amazing characters and falling into this glorious world that feels so real.
I've noticed that something has changed for me though. This year, I haven't been reading like I used to. Sure, I have had a lot going on this year... but at the moment, other than revising my novel, I really don't. So what has happened? It's not that my love for reading is gone, it's certainly still there.
I may have figured part of it out. I think I put too much in front of myself. I'm not talking about my yearly reading goal, that's still reasonable, and reachable. I'm talking about personal expectations. Like my goal to read 2-4 classics and catch up on my giveaway wins and read-to-review books. These are all great things that I had every intention to do... but for some reason, I just can't. Not entirely. I am trying, don't get me wrong. I've managed to do pretty good considering how much I have on the table there. I'm just not always in the mood for these books, at least, not in this exact moment.
Same goes for everything else. Like on my weekly update posts, I had that little section showcasing the books "Up Next". I decide on a couple books I want to read next... and then it sort of makes me feel obligated to read them next. So I force myself to read them, even though I might not be in the right frame of mind or in the mood for it. I do end up enjoying most of them in the end though. It just seems to take me forever to read some of them.
I'm not in a rut. I've got some great books to read. Really great books. What I'm thinking though is that maybe I need to stop forcing myself to read something out of a sense of duty. I need to just go to my shelf or pick up my Nook and see what sounds good to me in that moment. No more picking out a book just because I "need" to read it. I want to pick one up and get sucked in immediately and finish it in a day or two. I want that joy from reading again.
And I CAN have it again.
I just need to stop the high expectations, stop the obligations, start really loving to read again. So this is my determination: Rediscover my pure love of books again.
Have you ever reached this point?
Felt overwhelmed by personal expectations that you lose the love you originally had?
What have you done to make it better?
Felt overwhelmed by personal expectations that you lose the love you originally had?
What have you done to make it better?
I think this is probably a common problem among *our people* (book bloggers lol). We get bogged down with review books or books that need to be read by a certain date or oh look that book just came out I have to read it the second it comes out...that sort of thing...and then it becomes a chore.
ReplyDeleteFunnily enough with all the review books I had to catch up on it did the opposite for me recently...I read 12 books in August, which is a lot for me, and almost all of them were review books that HAD to be read by a certain date. I was so determined to catch up because then I promised myself I'd a) not request/accept so many, and b) read some of the many books I've bought, won, been given, etc. Now that I'm almost caught up I'm sitting here going 'what do I read next? I can finally choose a ME book' and I have no idea what to read lol. I'm getting tired of having a set schedule for books though, because it DOES suck the joy out of it and I'm more of a mood reader so now I can finally get back to reading by mood and not because I need to post a review on a certain date.
YES. A mood reader. I look at my shelves/on my Nook and see so many great books BUT not all of them appeal to me right now. I know that someday I'll read them, just not now. And hey, maybe someday I WON'T want to read them. You never know. Our tastes change over time sometimes. It's nice to just choose a book that you REALLY want/need to read. That's what I've been trying to do more often and it's helping a lot. :)
DeleteYes I feel this! I do make a list of books to read for the month otherwise I would stare at my 500 book TBR pile with a zombie face. But as soon as the mood hits me to read something specific, I usually veer off my list. It keeps me happy. I hope you find your balance. Reading because you "have" to is the worst feeling ever.
ReplyDeleteThat's a good idea, to have a list as a guideline but to take a step away from it to keep yourself happy. :) I hope I can find a good balance too. Thanks! :)
DeleteI have SO been there, girl. I AM there. I told myself I'd read so many books from my TBR - books I bought for myself and didn't receive for review - this year, aaaaaaand I've read maybe 5? 6? FAIL. I put a lot of expectations on myself too, with my TBR challenge, the DAC challenge, giveaway wins, unexpected books, ARCs and such. It's a LOT to keep up with for any of us, and so I think it DOES lead to getting that burned out feeling.
ReplyDeleteI really hope you get back your job, girlie. :)
OMG yes. I'd have to look at my list for the year to even see how many of these I've actually read for myself and not because I said I should or had to. It can burn you out if you're not careful, that's why I've been having to reevaluate the books I choose to pick up because I wanna enjoy reading. :) Thanks!
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